Little Nell played darts one time

And died during her match.

But Nellie never threw a dart.

She thought it best to catch.

 

Little Nell gave blood one day

And fell all out of sorts.

That giving and so-caring Nell,

Donated fourteen quarts.

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Little Nell was nervous
So she bit her nails all day.

She died because she didn’t stop

And chewed her hands away.

Steven and his Deadly Cheeks

Steven had some chubby cheeks,
Right below his eyes.
Round and pink and pliable
And of tremendous size.

Steven went out for a walk
And drew his final breath.
A strong wind flapped those cheeks about
And beat poor Steve to death.

Bacon Fat

I ate a bowl of pork-y grease,
A fact that I ain't fakin'.
And now when I go exercise
My sweat smells just like bacon.

 

Little Nell ate road kill
And then ran out of luck.
Her diet didn’t do her in.
She got hit by a truck.

Little Nell made chicken pie
To try and catch a fella.
Her only flaw? She ate it raw
And died of Salmonella.

Little Nell made hamburger
In Grandma’s old meat grinder.
She worked non-stop for 14 days.
Now nobody could find her.

Little Nell bought sharks as pets
And fed them rainbow trout.
But feeding sharks by hand was bad
As Nellie soon found out.

Little Nell wore suet shoes;
A pair of "Wides" not "Narrows".
But she passed on when set upon
By flocks of hungry sparrows.

The True Story Of Those Bears And That Girl With The Golden Hair

A family of bears
Found a blonde girl upstairs
Asleep on top one of their beds.

Annoyed with her snore-age
And without breakfast porridge,
They ate up the blonde girl instead.

A Short Term Relationship

Simple Steven Moulder
Was smitten with a boulder.

He loved her and he told her
And yet she grew much colder.

So then he went and rolled her
'Cause she was so much older.

Be Careful What You Pick and Eat.

I ate the berry "Straw".
I ate the berry "Blue".
I ate the berry "Raz"
And I ate the "Huckle" too.

I ate the berry "Boysen"
But the fact that stays as single,
I never have and never will
Eat the berry "Dingle

Updated Little Tea Pot song.

I'm a little shot glass
Drip, drip, drop!
Narrow at the bottom
Wider at the top!

Fill me up with whiskey
Drink don't stop!
'Til your liver falls out
Ker-Plop!

Little Nell fell in a wok
And that's not very nice.
She's now known as a "Number 6"
Or simply "Nell Fried Rice".