Little Nell

Little Nell was ironing;
A chore she thought was dumb.
But Nellie got distracted
And she flattened out her thumb.

Little Nell

Little Nell slept peacefully
Throughout the winter season.
But when it turned to springtime
She exploded for no reason.

All Hallow's Eve?

Put on masks and costumes!
Buy candy at the store!
Carve up Jack-O-Lanterns!
Then carve 'em up some more!

Let's go out trick or treating!
But what's that fact you mention?
It's January 26th?!?
I should pay more attention.

Timmy Tick

Timmy Tick lived on a dog.
The ear was where he aboded.
Tim gulped so much canine blood
That parasite exploded.

The Unfortunate Demise of The Milk Carton Lady

Milk Carton Lady was surprised to meet her fate.
She simply should have gone and read her expiration date.

The Fate Of A Duo Of Deer OR A Long Way To Go For A Pun

Two reindeer you might recognize-
A Rudolph and a Cupid-
Decided being nice was dumb
And started acting stupid.

They both said, "We will do some crimes!"
And set about their plan
To rob the world of rich desserts;
Namely cakes and flan.

They saw themselves as pirates
So with 12-inch kitchen matches,
They each poked out one of their eyes
And sported nifty patches.

They walked the streets and yelled their plans,
These antler-ed buccaneers.
And everyone who heard their yells said,
"Those are bad eye deers."

The Forseen Yet Ignored Death Of The Milk Carton Lady

The Milk Carton lady
Was surprised to meet her fate.
She should've simply read
Her expiration date.