Dog Poop

In my yard, a tube of waste.
I surely do not wannit.
For with bare feet, I surely know,
That I will trod upon it.

Little Nell, she played the harp.
“I’m good,” is what she said.
She tripped and fell on it and now
Resembles sliced up bread.

Invention #1

I think I'll invent "Mental Floss"
To thread my brain throughout.
So when bad songs get stuck in there
I'm sure to pluck them out.

Grandma's Excess Chin Skin

Grandma had a turkey neck,
All wrinkled up and clammy.
A strong breeze caught and picked her up
And sailed her to Miami.

Jenny and Her Face

Jenny always wore a veil
Fashioned from a doily.
Jenny wore the mask
Because her face was very oily.

She entered in a beauty show
And wound up in last place.
Jenny's skin was so slicked-up
Her nose slid off her face.

Little Nell

Little Nell wore cheese perfume.
She only wore it twice.
The second time, sweet darling Nell,
Was chewed apart by mice.

Little Nell

Little Nell, her hair fell out
From acid she was sloshin’.
It’s true she’s got less hair to clean
But lots more face for washin’.